Everyone has one (a body that is), no matter what its size, shape, colour, texture – they are generally much of a muchness.
Yet somehow, even in our same sex friendship groups, cultural groups, similar age groups we feel so separate and shamed by our body, thinking we are too unique to be accepted just as we are.
So we hide, cover, attempt to drastically transform and alter our bodies so that we can …
Fit in more?
Not stick out as much?
Cover what exactly?
Our Personal Story – that’s what!
Everything we have been through, experienced, felt, believed and thought is held within the cells of our physical body.
YES everything.
Things that recur more often or are repeated regularly tend to have a more physically visible trait in our bodies. Everything, whether presenting where you can see it or not, is stored and embedded on some level in our body.
Each thing laid down and stored then creates foundations or pathways for other things to embed and be stored.
Have I lost you yet?
Let me share a recent example with you and then help you to figure this out for your body too.
I was recently at a hospital appointment with my daughter. It was a training day for a new piece of technology to smooth out the management of Type 1 Diabetes, which she was diagnosed with at age 10.
The learning of this system, its consequences, the troubleshooting, the regulating of insulin, the timings of dosing etc etc, felt, to me, like re-learning everything we have adapted to over the past 4 years.
I have to say at this point, that my daughter was fine with it all and took to it like the proverbial duck to water.
I however, sat in that room feeling very much the same as when she had first been diagnosed.
Confused
Scared
Sad
Shocked
Anxious
Helpless
4 years ago the effect of these emotions on my body was a very tangible fight / flight response.
My nervous system shut down in some ways and any extraneous activity or power requirements were not available to me at the time.
It was like my body was mirroring the survival mode that my mind and heart had gone into.
All energy was focused on keeping my daughter alive, bringing her back to a hormonal balance through the new medication management and giving her as much health, love and mental support as possible so she could not only survive but return to thriving.
Any remaining energy and focus was spent on keeping working and providing for our survival needs to get us through this period of change.
I found anytime I tried to add in too much physical activity, too much social engagement, or too much work initiative my body would shut down.
In the form of an injury, fatigue or incompetence, it was sending me a message to slow the fuck down!
It took me about a year to come out the other side and know how better to manage my energy needs and requirements.
I thought I had processed and ‘healed’ that body, mind and soul experience pretty well. There were many therapies, learning, processes and methods I came across to bring balance back to my system.
However after my experience at the hospital with feeling those remembered emotions the other day, I noticed that when I got home I felt odd.
A little off kilter,
Not quite in focus.
I realized that I had slipped back into the energy of who I was 4 years ago at that time when all of me was affected by that one life experience.
Almost like an old pair of shoes that I had found hidden at the back of the cupboard and decided to try on again.
Rather than staying in that feeling and starting to run that past script and story through my mind and dwell on how I was feeling. I used some of those methods and processes that had helped me find my equilibrium and connection to myself again.
I chose to immediately shift that remembering out of my energy and my body so that I can from here on, step into a fuller, more progressed, more expanded and wiser version of myself.
Rewriting the possible story that lies ahead, rather than repeating the one that has been told before.
Let me help you to understand my point a little better and take you on a remembering journey…
Think back to a time when you were a kid and you fell over or got really physically hurt. Usually the easiest to remember are -
Grazed knees
Broken arms
Sprained ankles
Fingers jammed in a door
Or being kicked in the shins
You will have something specific that you experienced as a child that will create a feeling memory in your body or at least have a story around that event, as you have remembered it.
Now think about some physical injury or sudden physical accident that you experienced as an adult.
It will have a feeling or story that goes with that memory but probably not quite as visceral (feel-able) as the childhood one.
It is more of a dull memory that if you try to feel into it, is more like a restriction or a stopping point in your body, around which you have built a story of the event.
The same goes for thoughts and beliefs that we have had in the past or still have. Whether you are a kinesthetic sort of person or not, these thoughts and beliefs will also have had a physical effect on your body and created feelings in your body.
That thought you had when you were 10 years old and you thought nobody would like you in the playground if you couldn’t do a certain thing or weren’t liked by the popular people…
That belief that you had as a teenager when you believed that if you failed an exam you were dumb…
That experience of your first relationship break up that you thought your heart would never recover from…
The sadness of the first funeral you went to where the loss of that person rocked your world and sat with you like a weight inside you for a long time after…
All these thoughts, beliefs, emotions and experiences have a physical feeling to them and if you allow yourself to drift back to that time and feel those things again and listen carefully (like a nosy neighbour trying to hear what the couple next door are arguing about) you will hear, feel or see where that thing is living in your physical body.
I dare you – TRY IT.
If you can feel, see or hear that memory living in your body then you are still likely to be restricted by it in some way as it continues to play out in your body, mind and emotions.
Even if your mind has convinced you that you are over it and it is not that important any more.
NOW – if you are reading this, thinking that it is a load of poppycock, and you can’t feel, see or hear anything from your physical body –
BUT you have
a recurring injury,
a particular weight gain pattern,
a physical condition of any kind,
a deterioration that you are blaming on age
an allergy
just about any physical issue that is, well an issue…
Then I am saying that you have a ‘body remembering’ going on which is forming your personal body story and keeping you detached and disconnected from –
Who you really are on a soul level
Who you believe you can be in this life
What you desire to achieve
How you want to feel
The impact you can have and purpose in this life
And ultimately the love you desire to receive and give.
AND YOUR BODY KNOWS THIS.
That is why our body stories feel so personal
So shame-filled
So guilt ridden
Full of fear and comparison
BUT hark there is light… and not just at the end of the tunnel.
There is light, which can shine into the dark, unremembered recesses of YOU.
And it isn’t really anything mystical, inaccessible, magical (well a little bit) – it is actually quite simple.
It is a choice
It is awareness
It is a decision
It is a quieting
It is a listening
It is an acknowledgement
That is the light switch.
Simple as that.
Each of us has the ability to know this for ourselves and remove the pain, guilt, shame of the dark parts.
To be able to know the WHOLE of ourselves fully, deeply, truly and therefore be impervious to anyone else creating hurt and shame in us.
The complete honest knowing of ourselves is what builds confidence. Because there is nothing anyone else can point out, laugh at or expose about us that we have not uncovered and made peace with already.
Now that is a body freedom worth exploring and having.
I did say above, that this is a simple process that people can do for themselves.
However I am still surprised and amazed sometimes that people have never heard this or just don’t deep down know this about themselves.
I do know that there are some people who will read this and have a knowing inside them that this is something they need to do, MUST do, cannot put off any longer – but they just don’t know how to get started because it is not something they have ever experienced before.
And that is where, what I do can seem like magic – but it is a magic easily learned, felt, seen and heard.
It would be my joy to share this with you.
It fills me with lightness and smiles to see someone connect to this and be able to switch on that light in themselves.
I cannot, not share this!
So if you want to be proud of, own, know and celebrate your very personal body story and no longer be shamed or afraid of it – then you know what to do.
CLICK THIS and let's do a body mapping session together.